ScurvyBastard.com

Yes gentle reader this may be a great surprise for you but for once I have nothing to gripe and moan about!

Life is good, school went well, my dog loves me and so does my wife…kind of.  Now if only she would get me t-shirts from ThinkGeek.  Apparently she felt I was kidding her when she asked me what I wanted and I gave her a list of specific shirts not one Christmas but 2 in a row.  She decided to not get me any since she has never seen me wear a t-shirt.  Why then would I put it on my list two years in a row?

Oh wait, did that just sound like a gripe?  Maybe it was!  So grab yer boobies and get over it already!

Now that the semester is over at college I have been using this time to catch up on things I neglected while I was doing what may pass for studying.  One of those things is to work my way through a stack of mail.  Most of this mail is unsolicited crap from credit card companies and companies wanting me to donate to them or subscribe to a magazine…etc.

The really cool thing is that many of the companies have included postage paid envelopes and I have been really bored since school ended.  Want to guess what Scurvy has been up to?  You got it!  I have been taking one companies junk and putting it in another company’s postage paid envelope.  I have then been mailing them out.

You may be asking yourself why I am doing this so I will tell you…boredom!  Boredom and the fact that I am trying to be a good citizen and help keep postal rates down for all of us.  I figure that the post office charges a company for each post paid envelop that they deliver.  Apparently the post office does not make enough money by purveying boatloads of junk mail to our mail boxes so they raise postage rates for the last couple of years.  I am just trying to help generate a new revenue stream for them in order to help keep revenue up and postage from going up.

I realize this is not a new idea but I want to encourage everyone to help the post office.  Maybe once a month make that side trip to the post office to drop off the previous months past paid envelopes.  You don’t even need to waste time putting anything in them.  Just give them a quick lick and seal them up.

Let start a movement, or an organization!  Let us ask the junk mailers “how does THAT grab yer boobies?”!!!!!!

Is there absolutely nothing that can’t be found on the web these days?  I just finished an article on one of the CNET blogs about a service to tell you where the nearest public restroom is.  The service is SitOrSquat. 

This service has released apps for both the Blackberry and iPhone that you can use to track down the nearest toilet.  You can also apparently get info on the cleanliness of the bathroom so that you know if it is safe to sit, or if you have to squat.

I am just picturing the typical family trip with mom and dad in the front, kids and dog in the back.  Little Johnny is whining because he has to go to the bathroom REALLY bad.  So pa whips out the iPhone and punches in the nearest address so that he can get directions to make a pitstop at.  In the mean time a car stops in front of the family and while dad is looking down at his iPhone….CRASH!!!!

Do people really need one more reason to take their eyes off the road?

…and how does that grab yer boobies?

As has been pointed out in some comments, I have not been mentioning boobies nearly enough.  Of course this was pointed out by my slightly dubious acquaintance Bob so take it with a grain of salt.

I shall from here on out end all of my posts with “How does that grab your boobies?”.  Ok, so admittedly it is not quite as catch as Walter Cronkite’s tag line of “And that’s the way it is.” but not all of us strive to live up to Mr. Cronkite’s example.

How does that grab your boobies?